- Never Nair your backside (hair tends to be uncomfortably prickly as it grows back).
- North Hollywood should now be referred to simply as NOHO. Fo Sho.
- Never go to Vegas with a borderline anorexic girl who dresses like a goth whore. Trust me, you don't need the attention.
- Brian Molko is pretty...like a girl.
- Never play roulette with a shaking, senile, chain-smoking old man in the middle of the night at a third rate casino designed like a castle. He will distract you.
- One day in Vegas = 6 days in the real world.
- Road rage is real.
- Convincing yourself the lunch buffet at Whiskey Petes is good, then proceeding to play 2cent slots is a good indicator of a bad Vegas trip.
- Avoid taco places that use only the word meat on their menu without specifying what kind of meat it actually is. And taco burgers aren't really burgers.
- Bowling alley clerks are A-holes.
- Bikers scare me.
- So What is a sorry slogan to live your life by.
- People really are friendly in San Francisco.
- You just can't find a parking spot in the City. Not even at 1am.
- The Fillmore is a great venue for a gig.
- Jarvis Cocker is one charming c*!t.
- Never buy a concert ticket from the homeless.
- You can bribe pretty much any club bouncer/security.
- Freeways/Bridges collapse easily in the Bay.
- The best South Asian food can be found in the South/East Bay.
- The new Nissan Maxima is one comfortable car homey...that gets terrible gas mileage and has the lousiest turning radius.
- Sleep is good.






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